Na gavariyu pa russky

So after seeing Brian comparing me to a Rueben's painting, I've decided a.) to beat the hell out of him while he sleeps and blame the large Belgian guy in the corner and b.) pray that the rest of you are oblivious to Ruebens' work and don't know why that wasn't a compliment. I feel the need to say for the record that beating a naked Brian wasn't something I had planned to share with you all and really, I can't talk about it now, the experience was scarring me and whenever I feel extreme heat I may just pee my pants out of abject fear of the whole experience. I must say though, despite the fact that I nearly choked on the heat and died from the ice-cold post bath, it was eventually refreshing.

I drank absinthe today for lunch and so far, no side effects or hallucinations. I drank absinthe today for lunch and so far, no side effects or hallucinations. I drank absinthe today for lunch and so far, no side effects or hallucinations.

A little travel advice, always open the stuff on the train. We apparently passed up some GRANDE Kit-Kats and some decent food because we were scared of the KGB agent that was sleeping on the bunk below me and next to the food. I'm not sure he was KGB, but he was humorless and scary. On another train note, Brian has now seen firsthand why I rail on the Germans in good fun (my apologies here to Mom and Dad Dehass); while everyone jammed into a tiny train hallway waiting to get to their bunks, a group of Germans left their luggage in the hall in front of us while they determined who was getting which bunk and whether there was any David Hasselhoff tunes available on the in car radio. Clueless travelers despite being a very smart people.

St. Petersburg is beautiful. In many ways it is like Paris and in some others like Venice. I really love it here, even in the rain. If you come to Russia, you can't miss it, because Moscow wouldn't give you a flavor for what this country really can be. The Hermitage is pretty unreal, much like Versaille but in some ways, better. We hope to make it to the Summer Palace tomorrow but the weather has to get better or we can't take the boats.

A couple of side notes: The Republic of Coffee looks A LOT like Starbucks... circle logo, mayan in the middle, green. Ironically, they told me they didn't have lattes. Lattes... which in Russian is pronounced lattes. We went elsewhere for coffee... aparently something other than a republic.

We've had a number of WWGD moments while here (What Would Geoff Do?) and the thought has provided countless laughs at his absent expense, sorry but its true. The best was probably when we were in the bath with many naked Russian men and all of us agreed that Geoff would say enthusiastically, "we need to have a picture of us in here." That said, we miss you Geoff and wish you were here with us.

Lastly, I found a Russian Marriage agency. You will all see the photos at some point, it is hilarious. I wouldn't mind actually.

We need a few more responses, particularly something that will allow us to belittle you with our worldy knowledge.

Oh and ladies, the 80's are on their way back... pull out your flashdance sweaters and tuck your jeans in your boots. You'll soon look like you stepped out of a Pat Benatar video like many of these ladies...

Dave